My topic for this post might look a bit off-the-hook but let me tell you this; we got to try out others areas in this business of writing/blogging. Hope, I am still within the scope of my writings though. If I’m going off guard, somebody bring me back before it’s too late. Blogging surely is a business… Don’t you agree?
The definition of pornography says; “Sexually explicit pictures, writing, dressings or other material whose primary purpose is to cause sexual arousal.” Everyone knows that eyeing a shapely woman is a harmless male pastime. Don’t be confused. Staring sometimes can be a sin. The man gets a cheap thrill – maybe even thanks God for it – and the woman is flattered, and everything is cozy, hence the title, “How Harmful Is Pornography...?”.. Or is it not?
Do we; men [I am talking about the typical Ghanaian MEN] dismiss leering as harmless because we are too engrossed in seizing our own pleasure to give a split second’s consideration to our victims’ feelings?
What would you think of a one-armed man, those normally from the war-torn areas who suddenly grab a stranger [lady] and starts trying to rip off her clothes? She’s struggling to fend him off, frantically trying to protect herself from humiliating exposure, attempting to hold down her skirt with one hand, and clutching her neckline with the other while he’s doing his utmost to expose more of her flesh and underwear.
Doesn’t that same desperate battle take place whenever a woman with normal feelings is gawked at? Let say, an elegant lady shapely dressed from head to toe in an “am-ware” outfits. The absence of violence makes it no less an assault on a woman’s desperate attempt to preserve her modesty and avoid humiliation. Even if she manages to keep prying eyes out of her private parts, the entire ordeal is an offensive attack on her person.
Like struggling with a one-armed man, she has a chance of emerging with some of her modesty intact, but should she have to endure such a degrading battle, tugging at her skirt, calculating how to avoid bending over, knowing that if she relaxes her defenses for a moment filthy eyes could be thrust up or down her dress? Should she have to go through life haunted by the knowledge that at any moment her decency could be violated – even by someone who claims to be a Christian? These are all questions; I pose to you my female-friends.
"If women don’t want to be treated as sex objects, why do they go out of their way to dress like sex objects? If any woman really wanted to protect her modesty, why would she wear the ridiculous clothes most women wear these days? – the “I’m aware” types, so vulnerable to wind, and riding up, or flopping down, showing their beads and exposing parts of their boobs?’
Because they feel pressured to walk the thin line between not being looked down upon for dressing in a dowdy manner, while at the same time trying to preserve their decency. Ultimately, men determine women’s fashions. You have to agree with me on this. Some women are desperate to appeal to men and the rest follow like “n’guan” [trans: sheep], scared to act differently in a world in which so much rides on whether one is fashionably dressed.
In the western society where I’ve been to, it is usually the case that a woman is either dressed seductively or she is not considered to be well dressed and this is what our women/ladies/girls these days are copying blindly. This is so much the norm that women rarely stop to consider how carefully women’s clothing is designed to maximize sexuality.
Despite being quite experienced, there are gaping holes in the average woman’s understanding of male sexuality. A woman can be remarkably naive as to exactly what arouses a man and yet seem highly skilled in dressing provocatively. All she needs to do is buy fashionable clothes; something my Ghanaian ladies can’t do because it’s not the norm. Let’s be real here; how many of you my passionate readers/followers would boldly say; he/she has seen a Ghanaian lady buy a dress worth $5000.00 before? Show me that lady and I shall give her peanut pay-cheque.
Women/ladies who consider themselves to be well dressed, but modestly so, are usually oblivious to the fact that they display more flesh than their male counterparts. Any woman/lady not dressed provocatively risks so much scorn that most women feel driven to dress within a fraction of an inch of exposing to the world flesh that they long to conceal and reserve for the sanctity of marriage.
"I’m sick to the stomach of men forever being portrayed as villains and women as innocent victims." I'm resting my case here.. If you have any comment, please feel free and drop them here and I shall be glad to respond..